The Expendables 2 Game MINI-REVIEW

The Expendables 2 complete! This XBLA game takes roughly 10 hours to complete. It costs 1200MSP and comes with a total of 21 achievements and 400 gamerscore to be had. 

Note: You have to fully complete the game twice since the difficulties DO NOT stack.

I bought this game for a few reasons:

1) A friend asked me to play co-op with him (it features 4-player coop, which in most cases, is a great thing.)
2) It has Sly Stallone in it!
3) 400 Gamerscore
I went into this game 100% blind to what it was going to look or play like. It’s just so bad that it’s hard to express in words that are not the four-letter variety, ESPECIALLY for the asking price of $15! But I’ll try my best.

Expendables 2 is the least interesting hybrid of a twin stick shooter/Light gun -like sequences of fail on the Xbox 360. More so a twin stick shooter but, hell, it might be the only hybrid of the sort, and I pray it stays that way.  The Light Gun sequences of fail are exactly that, FAIL, to the 9th power!! You’re stuck with aiming a reticule around on the screen with your CONTORLLER while on rails or a set pathway. I don’t even think you can die during these sections, and there are quite a few of them thrown into the mix for bad measure. The only possible way it could have been worse is if they tried to tack on Kinect Support. I really don’t think I could have handled that on an emotional level.

Note to developers: Light Gun games SUCK without a light gun. Peanut Butter and Jelly is good, but not exactly desirable when the P or the J is missing in action. Make a game for a controller. Cool! Great! Make a game for Kinect. Yes! Exercise! Make a game that supports a Light Gun. Awesome! Light guns rock!! But damn you for designing a game and a good portion of its gameplay to work with a controller type that is not even the best option for the gameplay you created. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???? I’ll never understand this type of decision.
Gameplay is dung, graphics are crap, abilities/power-ups=super crap, voice acting is super-mega crapola on a stick! (Sly doesn’t even voice his character *RAGE MODE ACTIVATED*) It had some potential but it was clearly slapped together to coincide with the release of the movie….without any regard for a smidgen of quality control.
I really wanted to like and support this game since I’m a big Stallone fan, but I cannot recommend this heap of vile to anyone.

Not even to those just looking to blow shit up.

Save your money and go watch the movie instead. That’s most definitely cheaper IF you don’t buy concessions.

Rating: 3/10
Expendable as can be.

You Don’t Know Jack Review

You Don’t Know Jack is a throw back to the 1990’s an edgy trivia game for the at the time cutting age PlayStation 1. A lot of things have changed over the last ten years since the last YDKJ was released. Does this franchise stand the test of time or is it another game that shouldn’t have been resurrected? Should you fear the $30 price tag or should you embrace it? Find out after the break.
You Don’t Know Jack Review
Developer: Jellyvision, Inc.
Publisher: THQ, Inc.
Price $29.99
Some of you may remember You Don’t Know Jack from the days when the original Play Station ruled the gaming universe. The edgy fast paced trivia game got much critical acclaim back then and deserves even more now. I had feared the game would have lost a lot of its personality and appeal after a 10 year hiatus. To my surprise You Don’t Know Jack is back and better than ever. With the addition of 4 player local competitive play and Xbox Live support this may be the ultimate “party game” for the 360.
Due to the nature of the game you shouldn’t expect it to be visually stunning. But it looks pretty clean there are some charming animations my personal favorite is the animation for question 10 where the 1 and 0 consummate their relationship and produce a little baby “n”. The repeated animations are bound to get stale after awhile but if you are playing with against friends it shouldn’t matter.
The sound is where this game really shines. With thousands of lines of funny and topical dialogue and hundreds of mock commercials there is plenty here to keep you laughing. The announcer also reads the questions to you which is a nice change of pace over the standard trivia games.
The disc features 73 episodes which contain 10 questions each. The questions are really varied between current pop culture to astronomy and world history. The game features a pretty impressive range. It also already features a down loadable content pack of 10 additional episodes.  The first one is available now for 400 Microsoft Points ($5) with two additional packs already announced.  The only down side is each episode stays the same so you can just memorize them and dominate.
The achievement list isn’t too bad looking the game is fun  and offers enough replay value that you should be able to get most of them naturally. The most intimidating achievement is the losing one million dollars in the Jack Attack. I think I have an easy way to do it though it will take some testing. My favorite achievement is “Consolation Achievement” for not earning an achievement for 5 hours.  
You Don’t Know Jack is debatably the best trivia game on the 360 (Scene-it deserves a little credit) When it comes down to it I give the nod to YDKJ based on the $30 price tag and the charm of the announcer.  This game should keep you entertained for countless hours as long as you have friends to play with. If you don’t have friends it’s ok there are achievements dedicated you being home alone on Saturday night. This game is a very strong showing from Jellyvision, Inc. If you enjoy trivia games or playing competitive games with a group of friends pick this one up today!
Score:  8